I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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