you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
