So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
