theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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