god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
