Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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