hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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