I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
