I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
i've created a new STD.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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