its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Randomize
