just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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