On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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