It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize