i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
