Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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