Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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