I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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