You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
