I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
