btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
