i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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