your room smells of hookers.
And success
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
