That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
