ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
she looked like the before picture.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
