Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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