she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I'm really busy with my period
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