I'm drive I can fine osifer
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
