doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
