Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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