you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
