Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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