the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
