Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
