but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
