Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
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