I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
