Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I will be naked everywhere
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
