Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
