if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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