Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
