If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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