my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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