like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
