The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
We are all done wearing pants today
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I'm always down for nudity.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
