Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Randomize