well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
