they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
