Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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