Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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