quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
